Is this thing still on? I've missed putting More Water together, but also, like many, have been incredibly overwhelmed with the shit show that is 2020.
So, a quick catch up - I was furloughed, unfurloughed and then furloughed again. All in the same week. Then ultimately laid off two months later. I turned 32. (Let's go Magic year. Please bring magic.) I visited Yellowstone for the first time, co-created an infused lemonade, that I might add is very delicious, and have watched When Harry Met Sally at least ten times. I've cooked. A LOT. And, of course, got in a few good rounds of golf.
But one thing that is very different this year is the amount of time I've spent alone.
Typically I love and enjoy my alone time. I love a good nap, I like to write, read, paint, cook. All great alone activities. But this alone time is different, and it's been challenging. Usually my alone time is something I carve out for myself, a respite from social engagements and human interaction. This alone time? Well, not so much. This forced alone time, this necessary and mandated alone time, this has been exhausting. It's been heavy and testing.
While much of that has to do with the state of the world, politics, and the pandemic, part of it comes from losing touch with my meditative practice. Something that I imagine (read: know) would've been helpful during these days of increased unpredictability. Another part of it comes from this stage of growth in my life as I work insistently to undo the damage to my roots and my spirit of capitalism and patriarchy.
Learning my worth (and yours) is not tied to productivity. Imagining my identity without work tied to it. Making time to 'be' instead of 'do.' These are things I've been working on during my alone time with small successes.
In addition to slowing down and reflection, this aloneness has brought me both loneliness and solitude. It's really the loneliness that's led me to solitude. Because in the moments of unease, of overwhelm, of pessimism, I've been most able to acknowledge and explore my humanness. And, ironically, that makes me feel more connected. It makes me feel less alone.
In Detroit, the motor city, the auto industry led to an accidental art - fordite. Layers of auto spray overpaint have been furnished into beautiful 'gems' and turned into jewelry.
My dear friend Rachel made this absolutely delicious soup for us earlier this fall. A spin on a chicken noodle soup, the parmesan adds depth and the delicata squash gives it a hint of sweetness that helps bring out the richness of the other ingredients.
So many issues need our attention these days. It's easy to get overwhelmed. One issue that truly, desperately, needs all of our attention is climate change. And a topic I've covered in newsletters before, regenerative agriculture, is finally starting to hit mainstream (mainstream as in Woody Harrelson teamed up with Kiss the Ground for a Netflix documentary). If you haven't checked out Kiss the Ground, please do. It breaks down soil vs. dirt, the importance of diverse farming and agriculture, and composting - and simple ways you can help make a difference.
“I still get very high and very low in life, but I’ve finally accepted the fact that sensitive is just how I was made. That I don’t have to hide it, and I don’t have to fix it. I’m not broken. And I’ve actually started to wonder if maybe you’re sensitive too. Maybe you feel great pain and deep joy, but you just don’t feel safe talking about it in the real world. So now, instead of trying to make myself tougher, I write and I serve people to help create a world where sensitive people don’t need superhero capes, where we all can just come out into the bright, messy world and tell the truth and forgive each other for being human, and admit that yes, life is really hard, but also insist that together we can do hard things.” Glennon Doyle shares lessons from years of addiction and pretending, and the importance of taking the time to stop doing long enough to think, love, share and listen.
"Expectations grew that life would be, at least some of the time, amusing, and people, including oneself, interesting—and so did the disappointment when they weren’t." A long read on What Does Boredom Do to Us—and for Us?
A couple of songs I've been listening to lately: "Sing to You" by John Splithoff, Hit-Boy featuring Dom Kennedy "Nominated," and "Hold You" by Jaz Karis.
